Her Lone Star Cowboy by Debra Clopton

Author:Debra Clopton
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Steeple Hill
Published: 2012-10-07T04:00:00+00:00

Chapter Twelve

“Have you asked her out yet?”

Jess propped his boot on the lower rung of Murdock’s stall, hung his elbows on a mid-rung and studied the horse that was winning its way to becoming a national champion in women’s barrel racing. Jess had tossed and turned all night. He’d finally climbed out of bed at daybreak and ridden across the pastures thinking about Gabi…and his past. He’d ended up here, at Luke’s, and found him tending to Murdock before going inside to get ready for church.

Luke had taken one look at Jess and asked his question.

Hiding his interest in Gabi from his brother was obviously not happening. But did it matter? He’d come here for advice.

“No, I haven’t.”

Luke hung his elbows on the rung beside him, questions in his eyes as he stared at him. “Jess, man, what are you waiting on? You look like you haven’t slept all night. What’s up?”

“She has a history with drinking, Luke.”

The words hung in the barn like the tainted memories of their past. He didn’t need to say more.

“I see,” Luke grimaced, understanding without words what that meant to Jess. Silently they both studied the horse. Seconds ticked into minutes as Murdock quietly chewed on his hay, totally at ease with being studied.

“You said, a history. Does she have a problem with it?”

“From what she says, she gave it up when she had a near-fatal car wreck. A nurse helped her see how lucky she was not to have killed herself or the carload of kids she ran off the road. She accepted the Lord that night and turned over a new leaf.”

“But you don’t believe her.”

“It’s not that I don’t believe her. It’s, well, you know the old song and dance. How many times did we hear that from our dad. I’m giving up the alcohol, he’d say, slurring words because never did he say them when he was sober. Only when he was totally wasted—crying-in-his-beer-feel-sorry-for-me wasted.” Jess’s grip tightened on the rail, his stomach rolling with lost hope. “There was never any chance that he would really do it,” he finished in disgust. But as a kid it had been pain he’d felt. Pain and loss.

“You can’t judge everyone by him, Jess.”

“No, I shouldn’t. But when it comes to my personal life choices, you bet I can. And I do. And I will.”

Luke raked a hand through his dark, wavy hair which was similar to Jess’s. They’d inherited their hair and looks from their dad. Colt had sandy-brown hair, more like their mother’s. Luke and Colt had also inherited their mother’s brown eyes. Jess didn’t even have that reprieve when he looked in the mirror. Every day he saw his dad’s face and his dad’s ocean-blue eyes staring back at him. It was a reminder to Jess of the man he never wanted to be—ever.

And that meant Jess made choices all the time to avoid reminders of his dad’s life choices.

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